catatonia

this land that I live that I inhabit
motionless sick seeking desperately to escape through creative distraction
seven selves of me live in different directions
I pray for control and consistency
yet I wait
feeling afraid to leave the walls that bore me
lying in mediocrity to save myself from the potential of failure in self fulfillment
bipolar incoherent ramblings of a creative mind read as insights to madness
yet I'm confident
tomorrow will bring a different disposition